Tuesday, February 27, 2018
So what do I do to keep myself from getting depressed, or having what is generally referred to as diabetic burnout, over being a juvenile onset diabetic for over 52 years. Or how do I keep myself upbeat while having to deal with the ups and downs of living with juvenile onset diabetes, is a better way to put it.
I think the first reason is very simple. It's because I was only 5 when I was diagnosed. So I have lived with this disease or chronic condition most of my life. I don't know life without diabetics.
Secondly is because my parents didn't care about me. Basically, they hoped I would die because of my having diabetes. I attended two one week sessions of a diabetic camp where I learned how to give my injections by myself and how to fill up my syringe. This was ALL I learned. After the second session, at the age of 9, I was told all care and control of my diabetics was up to me. I was told I could no longer ask them for help with filling up my syringe or giving my injection. I couldn't ask for help with anything to do with my diabetes care, I had to do it by myself.
I had no lessons in how many calories I was supposed to eat. How much vegetables, fruits, starches, fats, dairy products, and proteins I was supposed to eat at every meal. They didn't tell me how to figure out how much insulin I needed to have when my urine tests were high and/or I wanted to eat a piece of cake. I had to figure this out all by myself. I wasn't allowed to see my diabetic doctor. The only doctor I ever saw was my family physician. Several times he told my parents I should see my Endocrinologist, but that never happened.
I always wondered why my parents kept buying my diabetic supplies when I knew they wanted me to die. I took me a while, but I did figure it out. They couldn't do anything to me outright or the town would wonder what happened to me. But if I died due to complications from diabetics, they could claim ignorance. They could claim that the horrible disease that their poor daughter had killed her. Excuse me while I go vomit.
Cancer to me is so much harder than being a juvenile onset diabetic. At least with juvenile diabetics, you have insulin to help you keep your blood sugar levels where they belong. You have glucose meters so you can check your levels whenever you want to. With cancer, a lot of the time you don't have any idea you have it. All of a sudden, boom. You need chemotherapy, radiation and many times a slew of medications. Or in my case a 10 1/2 hour surgery that included a heated chemotherapy. I was never sick. I went in for a hysterectomy and they discovered the cancer. I had two abdominal surgeries in two months. That was much worse than anything I'd ever gone through with my diabetes.
I also don't like people who say that diabetes is a disability. NO IT IS NOT. It is a disease or a chronic condition, but not a disability. I want to scream and pound my fists into my monitor whenever I read where someone says their diabetes is a disability. How in the world are we disabled? If you mean when we have insulin reactions, or as every other diabetic calls a hypo. Maybe you're having too many insulin reactions and your control sucks. If you're a new diabetic, or a teen who has just been given total control you get a pass. Insulin reactions does not mean you're disabled. A juvenile onset diabetic is not disabled.
I really hate about having juvenile onset diabetes are the stupid CGM's. See I'm one of several people who have problems with them. Granted the Dexcom G4/G5 is better than the G4 was. But even so, it doesn't match my Contour Next meter very often. I'm a person who believes that the CGM and their meter should be within a 10% +/- all the time. The 20% +/- that Dexcom says is acceptable is not to me.
I hate the beeping, that is what I hate the most. That is probably the thing about being a diabetic that bothers me the most. If I had my way, I'd say fuck the CGM. I really don't see the need for it. I don't like wearing it. The CGM, either on my pump or the receiver from the Dexcom, can say I'm 68 when I'm really 95. Or it'll tell me I'm 55 when I'm actually 150.
The reason I'm wearing it is because for some reason my endo and husband think I should. They both know that it isn't accurate on me, but they wants me to wear it. Both of them believe I'm unaware of my falling blood sugars. No I'm fully aware of when they go low WHEN I'M AWAKE. The problem with me is, if I'm doing something, I want to finish it before I take care of my blood sugar. I'm been this way since my diagnosis, and I don't think it's going to change. And if I go low while sleeping, I go low. I've never been able to tell that I'm low while asleep, never since my diagnosis at the age of 5. How others can do it is a mystery to me.
I have never had diabetic burn out. I have a difficult time understanding the concept. I don't understand why anyone would become depressed simply because they have diabetes. To me it simply makes no sense. Diabetes isn't a death sentence. You can survive living with it.
Monday, January 8, 2018
You cannot blame all men for the rapes of people. Nor the placement of your position in a company. Women in power are more mean, ruthless and cruel to those who are in their way.
The women in Hollywood have gone nuts. They have decided that they are going tell things that happened over 40 years ago. Talk about things that WERE legal when they happened. If they were legal when they happened, you should not be complaining about them now. If you were of legal age, agreed to whatever you did. Shut up. If you didn't agree, why didn't your parents do something? Why? It was up to your parents to not allow you to date someone that much older than you.
I'm so sick of hearing about things that happened to women 40 years ago when they were teens, when it was legal where they lived. It may not be legal or acceptable now. But get over it. You don't have a reason to complain about it now if you didn't complain about it when it happened.
A lot of people had a much worse childhood than you did and they aren't crying over what happened to them. Instead of going on and on, go see a shrink or a social worker for talk therapy. You're richer than us normal average people. Just shut up.
Friday, January 5, 2018
This one tells you that most juvenile onset diabetics get depressed simply due to being a diabetic. I've heard that so often I want to scream. Why be depressed simply because you're a diabetic? I don't understand that. Diabetes is one of the easiest diseases/chronic illnesses to live with. You eat correctly and test your blood sugar and take your insulin. Watch where you walk, if you get a sore, make sure to treat it so it doesn't get infected. But then everyone should be doing everything we're doing.
Then this person goes on and on about how hard it is being a diabetic. Well life is hard. Being a diabetic isn't any more difficult than someone with stage four kidney disease, or cancer. At least we don't have to worry about losing our hair due to chemotherapy.
Then when people say that juvenile onset diabetes is a disability, I want to shriek a loud NO you morons. It is not a disability. It's a disease or an illness not a disability. There is no way in hell I want to be labeled as someone with a disability. Nope, no way no how. It's not going to happen. I've told people I'm a juvenile onset diabetic, but I've never said I have a disability. Not once. NEVER.
I've always told people about my diabetes. It isn't an embarrassment to me. Now maybe it's because I've been one since I was five and I don't know anything different. When I told one college friend about my diabetes, I learned that his sister was also a diabetic. I started writing her because of our diabetic link.
I didn't have people tell me about their family members losing legs or arms due to gangrene. I didn't have any family members who were also a juvenile onset diabetic. I am the only one is over 6 generations. Only me. No one else. Just me. And there was only one type two running around the family. Since these diseases are different, and she was in her 60's and I was a kid, we didn't talk. Nobody in my family nor did any of my friends try to tell me what to eat or what not to eat. Tried to tell me that I was going to die early, that I couldn't have children. None of that.
My being a diabetic really wasn't an issue. It was just a part of me. Why can't other juvenile onset diabetics feel that way too? I don't understand.
Friday, October 6, 2017
Then any person who goes on their facebook face to say that the NFL players are babies, SOB's, ignorant, or just plain stupid, are called names. And they may be fired simply because they go on their private page to EXPRESS their opinion. That is FREEDOM of Speech. Excuse me but isn't this what the stupid NFL players are saying. If a person is fired for doing the exact same thing that the NFL players say they are doing, then what President Trump told the owners of the NFL teams was correct, Fire them for not standing. Because the NFL is a Business. It states in the rules that they are to stand for the national anthem and they are breaking the rules. I think the NFL players are stupid.
Now we have the Cam Newton, the QB of the Carolina Panthers being called names simply because he laughed at a question a stupid woman reporter asked him. When I heard the interview, I couldn't understand why anyone got bent out of shape. I am a female persona and I do not take offense at his laughter. I actually think it is right. It is funny hearing a woman ask any question to a professional male football player. It wasn't degrading to me or any woman who is sure of her femininity and sexuality.
I don't care if a women understands football, I do. I understand it more than my husband does. I don't like seeing a woman on the sidelines talking the any of the players or the coach. I don't like having to listen to a woman reporting the game. Most of the time these woman are not dressed correctly. I don't want to see their shoulders or how big their chests are. It's not a fashion show.
I don't like having women reporters in the locker room either. THEY DON'T BELONG IN MEN'S LOCKER ROOMS. I don't believe male reporters are allowed in women's locker rooms. So if men aren't allowed in women's locker rooms, women shouldn't be allowed in mens.
Monday, September 18, 2017
Thursday, August 24, 2017
They seem to think, simply because they are the parent of a juvenile onset/type 1 diabetic, that they KNOW what it's like to actually live with the disease/chronic illness. Well they don't. Living with diabetes and being the caretaker or parent of one is not the same thing. Yes it's difficult to have a child with some sort of disease/ or disorder. It's not easy. It's harder on the person who has the disease or disorder. Especially when the person who is caring for them is a control freak.
Anyway, I found one forum where the parents don't post as often, and if they do, they listen to those of us who have had diabetes longer than most of these parents have been alive. We know what's it's like. We were alive before meters were used on a daily basis. We had to test our urine. We were lucky enough to use glass syringes and not the awful plastic syringes we are now forced to use if we use the syringe instead of the pen, which I won't ever use.
END OF THAT RANT.
I've been having a discussion with, I believe a type 2 diabetic who it looks like has Medicare, or about to go on it. Apparently Medicare is a bit upset with Dexcom because they only have FDA approval of the G5 mobile CGM for dosing insulin. So Medicare has told Dexcom to make a G5 receiver that cannot be connected to the mobile device.
This fellow is being really obtuse about my responses. He says he doesn't understand what I'm saying. I've said the same things two different ways. The last time being more specific. He's just being a jerk. I think he's being stupid because he thinks he's better than me all because I don't have a smart phone.
#1 my T:Slim G4 can't use the G5. It's still under the original warranty. So I can't get it upgraded to the new version of the X2 without paying around $500. So I'm keeping the G4. I'm not going to carry two diabetic devices just to monitor my blood sugar. AND, the top reason is. How do I know that the G5 will be any better than the G4 in what my meter reads and what the CGM gives me. I don't.
I can understand why Medicare is doing this. It's economics. If a person doesn't have a CGM or doesn't have the right type of smart phone and knows the only way "legally" they can dose their insulin is using the mobile app, there will be some who will actually believe that Medicare has to purchase the right smart phone for them. Granted not all people are like this, but there are some. So Medicare is trying to prevent this by forcing Dexcom to get FDA approval for the G5 receiver for dosing too. I don't know why they didn't do this too. Because everything I've read, the only FDA approved dosing is the mobile app.
NOT EVERYONE has the G5 or a smart phone. Is it fair to them that they can't dose from their receiver? Yes they can do it, and I'm sure a lot do. BUT if they are like me and have problems with the CGM the majority of the time being incorrect, they could give themselves more insulin than they really needed. And since the receiver hasn't had the FDA approval yet, would Dexcom be at fault? I think not.
So Medicare is just looking out for itself.
Friday, August 18, 2017
You are not born with the homosexual gene. You are not born with male sex organs then one day decide you're really a female. Both of those are mental illnesses. Hear me Left wing liberals. MENTAL ILLNESSES. Due to the political correctness and pressure, the mental health community removed them as mental disorders.
Abortion is murder. A baby is living breathing person at conception.
Nobody is better than me, nobody is worse. We are all the same in God's eyes. Every person is equal to me and I am equal to you. A movie star isn't better, a ditch digger isn't worse. We are all human beings. People we are all people no matter where we live, the color of our skins or how much money we make.
About this racist crap the left wing is going on and on about. I'm not sure what I'm suppose to call you so, don't get upset. All you blacks, Negroes or African Americans you don't have too much to complain about. The majority of you who are complaining were not injured in the slave trade. None of you were slaves. Maybe your parents and/or grandparents were around in the 50's and 60's when things were bad in the south. BUT you weren't there. So you have nothing to whine about. Sure, maybe you are descended from slaves, but that's all. Get over it.
The people in America who really have a reason to complain about racism are the American Indians. Look what we, as the white man, did to them. What the white people did to their home and country. The Indians have so much more to complain about. They have been shoved onto reservations. The black people haven't had that degradation. Think about it.
How would you black, Negro, African American's feel if you were to have been forced onto a reservation like the American Indian? Would you have liked that? The Indians LIVED HERE. The white people came and called them savages. We stole their land and country.
You don't see the American Indians whining about racism.